Rants Your Pants Off – Apple iPhone

Almost everyone has an Apple product, we felt like we needed to address a few issues we have with their products… let’s clean up some things Apple!



Name: Lindsey ‘Danger’ Karcher

Age: 21
IG: lindseykarcher

Favorite hobbies/activities: Binge watching Netflix series, eating pizza, running Spartan races, lifting, correcting improper uses of your and you’re, line dancing, ‘juice cleansing’ aka consuming copious amounts of wine, and of course, quoting Will Ferrel movies

Best pickup line: I had a man approach me once, look me dead in the eyes and say  with complete sincerity “I would cuddle you so hard”

Worst pickup line: Less of a pickup line but more of a general rule of thumb: any guy that tries to approach me at the gym is a no go. This is my sacred ground and you are messing up my set. Also.. you smell like Fritos

Celebrity crush: a close tie between the guy that plays Ragnar on Vikings and Jared Letos man bun

Describe yourself in three words:
Eccentric, blonde, badass

Desired profession:
I read that someone actually gets paid money to be a ‘Professional Mattress jumper’ I’m not entirely sure what that means but I like it..

One funny story about yourself:
I was dating this guy once and he told me he wanted to introduce me to his parents. They gathered their whole family for a barbecue and I was so nervous. When they opened the front door the show was on. I put on my huge smile and handed the man who opened the door the cookie platter I made and start messing with the little dog. Then the guy gives me a strange look and asks “so are you here for Madison?” And I’m I say “no I’m here for George! I am so excited to meet you guys he has nothing but great things to say about you…” They look at me puzzled… There was no George here. I look down at my phone and there were 5 missed calls from him. Apparently I was three doors down. I gave them a few cookies as an apology and ventured on.

lindsey karcher

Share this:

About the author


Businessman & Entrepreneur, Marketing Consultant, MBA EGB 2017